Brian: "No I don't want my dick sucked" Brian:
"Five guys? That's too much!" Brian : "No
sex after 7"
Ted: "I am totally confident in myself!" Cowen
& Lipman: "Thank you so much for this Emmy! We'd like
to thank...." Justin to Michael: "You know...Brian
really sucks in bed..." Lindsay: "I LOVE that I'm
a lesbian!"
Brian: "Justin... Do you want your eggs poached or fried?" Brian
to Joanie: "You are the best mom in the world." Lindsay:
"I am comfortable with our financial status." Brian:
"About my new place… I was thinking IKEA..."
Brian: "If I keep sewing these designer labels on my
clothes then no one will realize I'm really buying my wardrobe
at the Big Q." Brian: "I just...I just want to
find someone who really wants to have a relationship. Not just
sex."
Debbie to Mikey: "It's none of my business who you love". Debbie:
"I'm going to get rid of this ridiculous wig." Debbie:
"No, that t-shirt is too inappropriate"
Brian to Justin: "You need money for school? Go to someone
who cares!" Brian to a shrink: "I'm not interested
in sex, I just want to talk to you about some problems I have
with relationships."
Lindsay to Mel: "Brian really didn't jerk off in a cup." Lindsay
to Mel: "Of COURSE I love YOU more than Brian!" Lindsay:
" Brian who?" Ben: Buddha who?
Brian: "Now everyone joins hands...I'd like to say grace." Brian:
"You know, straight people aren't so bad." Brian
to Justin: "Hurry up, I don't want to be late for brunch
at Lindz and Mel's house."
Michael to Brian: "Put it on me. Now roll over." Brian
to Michael: "Put it on me. Now roll over." Emmett
to Ted: "Put it on me. Now roll over."
Melanie to Brian: "I'm glad that you're the father of
our child." Craig Taylor: "Let me introduce you
to my son-in-law, Brian." Justin: "I like pussy…" Brian
to Justin: "I need you" Brian to Emmett: "Will
you be my personal wardrobe consultant?" Brian to Ted:
"You look hot!" David: "You choose."
Michael: "What do you think Brian… The Gucci shirt,
or the Prada blouse?…" Brian: "Michael, Michael…
When will you learn that Labels aren't everything!"
Brian to Michael: "I'm going to fuck you. I'm going
to fuck you all night long." Brian to Debbie: "There
are more important things in life than sex.
Brian: "Lindsay, I just realized that I'm straight and
really want to marry you. Lindsay: I'm sorry, but Melanie
comes first with me."
Joan to Brian: "I've been a terrible mother." Brian:
"I will grow old gracefully."
Daphne: "I'll never say oh my god again." Chris:
"Handjobs by hot guys are cool." Cynthia: "I
quit Brian."
Mel: "Where are you going?" Lindsay: "Bra
shopping!"
Lindsay to Brian: "Mel is right, Brian." Brian
to Mysterious Marilyn: "Are you coming or going? Or coming...then
going? Or coming...and staying??"
Brian: "We can go out after I finish knitting this sweater."
Jennifer to Michael Jackson: "Please touch my son." Jennifer
to Melanie: "Please touch my daughter."
Michael: "Comics are a waste of time." Michael:
"Said no and that's final."
Daphne to Justin: "I don't want to hear about your problems
anymore." Brian: "Hand me a tissue, you know how
emotional I am...."
Cowlip to interviewers: "Here's the truth..." One
of Brian's tricks: "Don't touch me like that." Brian:
"I'm still a virgin." Brian: "I'm going to
be late for church." Brian: "I've ran out of condoms." Brian:
"Who cares how I look and I don't mind the aging process
one bit. As a matter of fact with age comes wisdom."
Anyone to Debbie: "You have impeccable taste!" Craig
to Justin: "Wanna come with me down to Liberty Ave and
pick up some hot hunky guys together?" Mel: "You're
right Linz Brian is totally HOT!!!" Justin to Brian:
"Hey, do you wanna do it with a girl tonight?"
Possible spoilers for season 3:
Justin: "I love you Ethan." Melanie & Lindsay:
"Craig, we'd like you to be the father for our third child." Brian:
"Are you sure you don't need anything Claire?" Justin
to Brian: "Ethan was much better in bed." Unknown
friend of Justin's to Brian: "Oh, so you're the guy Justin
fucks more than once." Gus: " _ _ _ _ " (fill
in the blank with any word)
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